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but parents haven't noticed
A new survey by the American Psychological Association says that teenagers are more stressed out than ever before. But their parents, for the most part, haven't noticed.
According to the survey, which was released Nov. 3, pressure at school and financial problems at home have had a greater impact on high schoolage kids than parents believe.
Fortyfour percent of teens said they under pressure to do well at school, but just 34 percent of parents think their kids feel that way, the survey showed. Thirty percent of teenagers surveyed said they were worried about their family's financial situation, while only 18 percent of parents thought that their kids were stressed about it.
Teens were also more likely than their parents to report that their stress levels had increased in the past year; 45 percent of teens age 13 to 17 said that they worried more this year, while only 28 percent of their parents said that they thought their teens were feeling more stress. Parents who were surveyed also tended to downplay the severity of their teenagers' stress, with less than 5 percent rating their child's stress as extreme, compared to 28 percent of teens who felt they were severely stressed.
And, as it does with adults, stress seems to be taking a physical toll on our teens. They report having headaches, difficulty sleeping, and changes in appetite which seems to come as a surprise to their parents. While 49 percent of teens said they find it hard to sleep because of stress, only 13 percent of parents observed it in their kids.
The APA's executive director for professional practice, Katherine C. Nordal, PhD, says "It's clear that parents do not fully appreciate the impact that stress is having on their kids" and that parents' reactions to their kids' stress levels are in line with earlier research about parental perceptions of teen behavior. "Parents often under report drug use, depression and sexual activity in their children. Now it appears the same may be true for stress."
I also have to wonder how much of the disparity is because we, as parents, are so consumed by our own stress that we forget how it felt to be a teen. You couldn't pay me enough to go through adolescence again; as far as I'm concerned, those were not my salad days. Sure, the pressure to fit in at school may seem small now, but if you think about it, how much time and energy and money do we spend following trends and wooing friends as adults? To a teen, acing a test is as stressful as facing an indepth performance evaluation at the office. And, as for the economy. of course they notice what we're up against. While we're stressing about how we'll manage with less money, or kids are worrying about the same thing.
Parents of older children, please weigh in: Are your teens and tweens stressed out? Do you think our stress is rubbing off on our kids?
Lylah M. Alphonse is a Globe staff member and mom and stepmom to five kids. She writes about juggling career and parenthood at The 36Hour Day and blogs at Write. Edit. Repeat.
Where is the report on middleschoolers? Their days are packed; not all districts (such as mine) require gym both for good physical health and for stressbusters. Heck, my child doesn't even have recess. "Walking to and from classes is the equivalent of recess,[url=http://www.holisteroutlet.cc]hollister pas cher[/url]," the School District says.
She comes home crying because there's no break during the day. Lunch is hurried.
All because of? MCAS prep! The lovely exam, cutting into break time, making break time nonexistent.
High schools should certainly have open campus, so the children get some down time during their long, stressful days.
As for the unaware parents talk to your kids, every day.
Click through the link in the post above to get more data form the survey the stress levels among tweens were nearly as high, and the awareness levels among their parents just as low, unfortunately. LMA
Posted by reindeergirl November 16, 09 02:11 PM
I do know how stressed my son ishe's 11 and in middle school, and highly verbal and forthright about all that's on his mind.
Posted by stressed mom of stressed kid November 17, 09 12:22 PM
I went to a top high school 25 years ago, and my son's 8th grade curriculum is as demanding as my senior year of high school relative to the amount of homework and complexity of material. Teens' brains are still developing, and in my view not able to keep up with the social and academic demands.
Posted by Acton mom November 17, 09 01:10 PM
Although MCAS is certainly a contributor to our kids' stress, I really think we as a society in general is to blame. You can start right out with Baby Einstein and this seeming push to make sure our kids are the best and the brightest and it extends right into schools where every kid is "gifted" and sports where excessive competition starts in Kindergarten. Stress!
In addition, we buy our kids everything to make sure they fit in. Our lower middle class school is filled with tweens wearing Northface Jackets ($150), Uggs ($150), carrying coach bags and playing with their Itouches ($299) and texting on the latest phones. How can the typical family that is fighting 10% umemployment keep up with that? Stress!

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